MY DEAREST RYAN JR.

My first born, you were so wanted from day one, you had my heart from the first time I saw that blue line that was barely there. 

Being your and your sister’s mother has been the biggest achievement in my life. I adore you.

10 years ago when you were placed in my arms I knew that I wanted to be the best mum ever. I knew I wanted to give you every chance in life for you to succeed. I knew that this wasn’t going to be an easy task but I’ll do my best to make sure that you fulfil every dream you had.

Watching you grow into the little man that you are today has been such a joy. You are the most amazing big brother to your little sister, I know she looks up to you and I know that no matter what happens you will always be there to protect her. 

Your sense of humour and goofiness kills me; no matter how upset anyone is, you always manage to make people laugh with your silly acts because making people happy is something that makes you happy. 

But I always want you to remember that you don’t have to make everyone happy if it makes you unhappy. I want you to always remember that you always come first no matter what. 

One of the things that I am most proud of is how you speak your mind and know exactly what you want. Yes we might not see eye to eye now but I know that this is preparing you for your future and I know that you will be ok. 

My darling boy, my little shaman! I want you to always remember that I love you with all my heart, that I sometimes might be hard on you but it’s not because I want you to be sad but because I want you to be the best that you can be. That I will always be proud of you. That I am always your number one fan and that I’ll be there for every single one of your triumphs as well as when things don’t go your way. 

That my arms will always be open whenever you need a hug or an ear to talk to. 

I want you to remember that since this is the last year that I walk with you to school, that the school run will forever be my favourite time because I love listening to you talk about the dreams you had the night before, or having conversations about the things that are important to you, even when they were about Fortnite, Avengers, Harry Potter or Lord of the Rings. 

My boy, being your mother is an honour. You truly are an amazing , gentle loving boy. I am in awe at how you have dealt with the challenges that have happened in our lives as a family and your smile has never faltered. Your love for every single one of us, especially your sister. 

I know you are growing way too fast and you want to do things on your own but as your mami, I want to keep you small a little while longer because I am afraid that you will not want to spend time with us and doing things with us will be a drag since you might want to spend time with your friends. 

Please don’t grow too fast, please love the age that you are in and enjoy every single day that you are given so that when you look back you have great memories and that you made the best of every day. 

Take your time and breathe deeply when things don’t go your way. Don’t rush, things will always happen because they are meant to. That no matter how hard things are they are always going to turn ok, as long as you trust yourself. 

Hearing you say that I am the best mama makes my heart so happy, because I am a mother thanks to you. 

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