When I went to confirm my pregnancy and the doctor congratulated me, it took me a whole minute to realise she wasn’t being sarcastic.
Continue reading EVERYTHING CHANGEDTag: love
HAPPY BIG THREE-OHH

I’ve heard turning 30 can be a strange feeling of mixed emotions, though I won’t pretend I know what it feels like because I really don’t ha. However, if there’s one thing I do know about turning 30, is that it is definitely a milestone in ones life and should be celebrated in style.
I knew from a long while ago that whatever I chose to do for your birthday, it had to be ‘dope’ as you would say. Not merely because of the fact you were turning 30 but because I felt you truly deserved to be appreciated, recognised and praised for the man, the father, the partner, the son and the friend you are, which is nothing short of amazing.
Not many people are aware of how our relationship began and I’m sure one day I’ll write about it. But for now, let’s just say, My biggest fear wasn’t telling my parents I was having a baby, my biggest fear was telling Scott. Fearing it was something he never wanted, fearing he didn’t want to be with me and fearing he wouldn’t have wanted to be apart of the babies life. Whilst having heart palpitations when I told you because I didn’t know what you were going to say, you then gave me even bigger palpitations when you held my hand because I didn’t anticipate anything close to that. To then hear you say that we were going to do this together and the night we met you felt I could be the one. I quite literally could not believe what you were saying yet everyday since you have proved time and time again that they were not empty words.
Continue reading HAPPY BIG THREE-OHHMYLA ROSANNA SAUNDERS VARGAS

Myla Rosanna Saunders, the name we fell in love with instantaneously. Early on in my pregnancy, Scott and I agreed this would be her name if it was a girl and to our incredible surprise, baby girl it was.
8 pounds, 9 ounces she weighed when she was born and a tiny segment of my body felt a brief sense of relief that I didn’t have her ‘naturally’. She would of annihilated me. As big as she was for a baby, in our eyes, she was teeny. Myla, an extension of us each, who stole our hearts forever, also resembled a wrinkly, aged, senior citizen. Though, during those precious moments, she couldn’t have been more dazzling. Love is beautiful, love is blind. Her first 24hours of life had Scott and I completely hypnotized by her existence. Her crinkled face, her minuscule hands and feet, her smooth skin, her plumped lips, her buttoned nose, her slightly curled eyelashes, her hamster like cheeks, her gunky hair and her baby smell became our obsession.
Continue reading MYLA ROSANNA SAUNDERS VARGAS